Savoring a God-sighting!

What’s on my mind this morning? The glory of the Lord - a thin place - savoring a God-sighting! You know - those moments when you feel God’s presence or see signs of God’s work. It might be the kindness of another person, or the order of things that happen right before your eyes that draw you into the already present Presence of God. Sometimes these moments seem simple and obvious and at other times they are so closely connected to the way you NEED to see God that they are undeniably personal.

Over the past 16 months, I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery, rest, renewal, re-creation, and searching for what God is calling me to next. It’s been a journey filled with faith, trust, soul searching, travel, trying new things, being vulnerable, fear, and a LOT of waiting and ‘trying’ to be still. 

One of the biggest things I’ve learned about myself is that the fear I have over whether others will want/need what I’m offering is just a thought. Focusing on ‘what others will think’ or the fear of rejection is really just an excuse to stand still. It provides me with a reason to shrink back and withhold the offerings that are in my heart to offer. This grip on the offerings of my heart serves no thing or no one - but the fear itself. And friends, as I write this, there is a voice in my head that says “That’s not God.” 

I’m learning to take a step by offering what’s on my heart to those who I believe might be interested and need it. That’s, truly, the only way I’ll know. I have to test it. Send up a trial balloon. So I am. 

In February 2019, I started Dinner & Storytelling events in my home. I followed my heart and applied what I’ve learned to be true about the healing that comes through telling our stories and learning how to hold space as attentive and intentional listeners. It has been a rich experience. Recently, I started looking up information on leading storytelling and discovered that I was on track. I also discovered a Certification in Narrative Medicine at Columbia University. I know first hand about the connection between storytelling and emotional health, but am thrilled to learn there is a strong connection between storytelling and physical health. On some level, I am not surprised. I want to lean into the fullness of the benefits of storytelling.

Retreats, workshops, book studies, and storytelling experiences are part of a list that I’ve been developing and have recently put in the hands of a few people to consider as part of some collaborative ministry. The fear I mentioned earlier had kept me from moving forward with this and I finally decided I had to test the water. I had to go with what I was feeling led to do. I needed to move. So I did. And now, I have some conversations in the works and I can see tremendous possibilities. Sometimes I’m the only one in my way.

The Obstacle is the Way is great language for times when the only way forward is through the obstacle standing between here and there….even if that obstacle is me. I get it. Frequently, the obstacle is my thoughts - which are super powerful. They can stop progress in its tracks. But, when I decide that I will test the thoughts and move through them, then I can see a clear path and movement comes naturally.

So, what about that God-sighting? Well, as I merged onto 630 early this morning, I put my blinker on, got up my speed, and looked left to merge and as I glanced into the rear view mirror, I saw nothing. No cars - for as far back as I could see on the road. Not one single vehicle. As I rounded the curve to merge onto I-30 East, I noticed fog was still hanging low - the kind of fog where you can still see the tops of buildings and construction, but the lower levels are covered. The fog was also obscuring the sun and the colors were spectacular. After moving into my left lane spot for the next merge, and as I crossed over the Arkansas River, suddenly a group of cars in front of me moved right over to the middle lane all at the same time. Immediately, there was wide open road in front of me. The path before was visible and clear. No more obstacles.

This sudden movement triggered in me the realization that I was (AM) on the right path. That I am getting out of my own way. That there is a clearing on the horizon. In this moment, I glanced over to see the sun peeking in and out of the fog and felt the powerful Presence of God - I could see (and feel) the Glory of the Lord. Tears and peace in the same moment. 

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of your always present Presence. Thank you for revealing your Glory to me in ways both great and small. Thank you for teaching me your language that is just between us - personal and intimate and undeniably US. Thank you for giving me the courage to offer all that I am and all that I have to you and to others. Continue to open me up to the obstacles that are there for my protection and those that are there for my growth and moving through. And give me strength to sing always, “Alleluia!” Amen.